Are you Doing the Work?
Photo by Anna Bass
“To shine your brightest light is to be who you truly are.”
~ Roy T. Bennett
These early days of January seem full of contradictions, don’t they? On the one hand, this is a time of renewal, with people enthusiastically embracing changes to make their lives better. I applaud those of you who have made resolutions and are working on developing new habits.
On the other, it’s a time of letdown, with cold, dark days that keep us inside and isolated, in stark contrast to all the social activities and events of the holidays.
To combat the darkness, for years now I’ve been using what we call a “happy light,” a full-spectrum light which mimics the sunlight we’re missing on these long winter days. Studied by Norman E. Rosenthal at NIMH, light therapy is one solution for folks diagnosed with Seasonal Affect Disorder, or SAD, which makes them more gloomy and lethargic from late fall to early spring. If that sounds like you, you may want to read up on this non-medication depression treatment which has been shown to alleviate symptoms for 60-80 percent of people.
As a kid growing up north of Philadelphia, I hated January, with all the snow and ice. It seemed like the longest month of the year, and I was often sick.
(Some things never change. As I’m writing this I’m recovering from a respiratory bug. What has changed is the way I look at things. Instead of getting upset about my enforced seclusion, I’m viewing this downtime as an opportunity to recharge after weeks of elevated activity.)
Like many of you, I suspect, I tend to do more reading in January to pass the time. I enjoy fiction, and alternate that with nonfiction books that inspire me with new ideas for growth. Both serve to take me out of myself, and lift my mood, in different ways.
My niece just published a modern-day Pride and Prejudice variation called A Good Name that I’m anxious to dig into. She’s a grown woman with six kids now, but when she was in college, she shared bits of her fiction with me and I was amazed by her creativity, especially in her ability to build entirely new worlds.
Our book club is starting Byron Katie’s Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life in a few weeks, which has been on my reading list for a while. Years ago my sister went to a weekend seminar taught by Ms. Katie and shared some of her concepts with me. I find her most interesting idea to be this one from her book jacket: “Contrary to popular belief, trying to let go of a painful thought never works; instead, once we have done The Work, the thought lets go of us. At that point, we can truly love what is, just as it is.”
“The Work” is the term Ms. Katie gives to a method of self-inquiry she developed for solving problems which involves asking yourself a series of questions designed to test the validity of your thoughts.
Like many spiritual authors, she believes that our thoughts cause most of our suffering, and that we all have the capacity to end much of our own suffering, allowing for joy to become our predominant emotion.
Conscientious to a fault, I can ruminate with the best of ‘em, so I very much like the idea of my thoughts letting go of me. Once we get into the book and I begin to do The Work, I’ll let you know my impressions of it.
(I’m chuckling as I write this because my husband and I are fond of movie quotes, and one we’ve been using a lot lately is patient Bob Wiley’s line to his new psychiatrist Dr. Leo Marvin in What About Bob? Bob, who is excessively neurotic and needy, is trying to convince Dr. Marvin to see him while the doctor is on his vacation in Lake Winnipesaukee, NH, even though Bob has followed him there, which is against doctor-patient guidelines. While pleading with him, Bob says, “I'm doing the work…I'm baby-stepping…I'm not a slacker!”)
Best wishes to you on whatever “work” you’re doing on yourself this week. I know you’re not a slacker, and baby-stepping is just fine.
Affectionately,
Elaine