THE AUTHENTIC LANE—Exploring Our Relationships. Discovering Ourselves.

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Look for the Helpers

Photo by Anna Bass

“When you don’t see the light,
Be the light.
Share the light.”

~ Margo Vader

I think for most of us, our tolerance for the huge and unforeseen disruption COVID-19 is causing in our lives ebbs and flows from day to day.

It’s been interesting seeing the various coping mechanisms we’re all employing to get ourselves through it. When I texted a friend I hadn’t heard from in a while, she said she was in “hermit mode.” Another said she felt like she was in a state of suspended animation. My psychoanalyst friend posted a video to help people cope with their emotions during times like these. Essentially, she advises us to go easy on ourselves. 

I’ve been enjoying watching all the creative ways people are finding to fill their time during the enforced stay-at-home order most of us are under.

In the absence of children’s museums and playgrounds to visit, my kids are having daily “dance parties” with their toddlers.

Many of my younger friends are doing crafts with their children to combat the boredom. Pinterest is a gold mine in times like these. Look at these sweet toilet paper roll unicorns a friend’s daughter made! (Maybe this is why everyone is buying so much TP?)

A cousin is baking. We shared banana bread recipes the other night and were surprised at how different they were. Here’s mine, which I’ve been perfecting since I was 11 years old.

A friend is writing individual, handwritten letters to everyone on her Christmas card list.

I’ve been talking to relatives on my cell phone during my daily walks. There’s nothing I love more than the deep, heart-to-heart conversations that are so hard to come by in normal times.

We will all be changed by this pandemic, in ways we can’t yet imagine. Some for the better, and some for the worse. We won’t soon forget it, that’s for sure. The extended time at home is difficult for many, and yet we’re already seeing some unanticipated benefits. 

I think it’s been revealing to all of us how well we can still connect during this sequestration.

Tools like Zoom, Google Hangouts, and Adobe Connect make it possible for us to do our work, have our meetings (even family ones), and receive online education in areas never imagined: yoga, martial arts, painting.

And the love, oh the love, that we are expressing toward our fellow human beings!

It started with those videos of the Italians singing to each other from their high-rise apartments in an attempt to keep their spirits up.

And then the pictures of adults outside the nursing home in Washington state on their cell phones, visiting with their parents through their apartment windows.

People sewing masks and cheering healthcare workers on as they finish their shifts.

Teachers decorating their cars and parading through the neighborhoods of their students to show them they care.

Older children decorating their sidewalks with chalk pictures so that younger kids can be kept entertained on their walks.

People putting teddy bears and other stuffed animals in their windows so the little ones can go on a scavenger hunt.

Families with school-aged children convening at the bottoms of their driveways at 8 a.m. to say the Pledge of Allegiance together.

Celebrities offering free songs and mini-concerts on Facebook Live, including this poignant rendition of “So Far Away” by my fav, Carole King.

Choirs of college students like the one from the Berklee College of Music gathering online to sing love songs to us.

According to Mr. Rogers, whenever he was confronted with scary news as a child, his mother advised him to “look for the helpers.” He taught that concept to kids when he did shows dedicated to helping them deal with turbulent or upsetting times, and it has become a comforting notion for us as adults.

We are seeing the helpers in abundance lately, and I am deeply touched by it.

What evidence have you seen of them in your community? What’s your favorite contribution been?

After such a divisive few years, the onslaught of concern for each other makes me feel hopeful that we will come out of this crisis a much more compassionate people than when we began it, despite the great hardship and losses for so many.

As this saga wears on, may you be comforted by the continuing display of love shown by neighbors helping neighbors all over the globe.

Affectionately,

Elaine

 

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Elaine's Banana Bread Recipe

Ingredients:

Wet:

3 ripe bananas (mashed)
1/3 cup sugar (1/2 cup if you like a sweeter bread)
1/3 stick butter (softened)
2 eggs

Dry:

1 3/4 cup flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt

Heat the oven to 350 degrees.

Mix all wet ingredients together in a large bowl. In a separate smaller bowl, mix all dry ingredients well. Fold the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients and mix well.

Coat a 9” x 6” loaf pan with non-stick spray and pour the batter into it.

 Bake for 45 minutes or until bread is golden brown on top. The toothpick should barely come out clean when stuck into the crack (the least cooked part of the bread). Don’t over bake. Cool on a wire rack. This bread stays moist whether you eat it warm, cool, or lightly toasted. Enjoy!