Is it Time to do a Life Audit?
Photo by Sue Ivy
“We don’t learn from experience. We learn from reflecting on experience.”
~ John Dewey
One evening this week we had a longer-than-usual chat with our son who was waiting in the JFK airport for a return flight to California. He was on a business trip—the company he works for has quarterly meetings and they rotate locations between L.A., Nashville, and NYC. We asked him the purpose of the meetings and he said over the course of two days they do an in-depth evaluation of what happened in the last quarter and how well they met their objectives. They talk about what went right and what went wrong. Then they do some planning and goal-setting for the next quarter. He’s worked for several different companies over the course of his career, but said this is the most structured process he’s ever been a part of.
Years ago I was on the steering committee of a small startup. We had monthly meetings where we did similar kinds of evaluations. We also had retrospective meetings (which my son says are called “retros” now) after our software releases to look at how we could improve our processes.
My writers group does a similar “post-mortem” after each of our annual conferences. I’m sure many of you have been through these types of audits at work or in organizations you volunteer for. They make good sense, after all. One of my bosses used to quote Lewis Carroll: “If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there.” In other words, you first need a goal before you can figure out the steps to accomplish it.
It’s important not only to have a plan, but to evaluate it from time to time to assess how it is working.
So the question is, how many of us do audits of our personal lives?
How often do we designate a time to take a step back and look at the bigger picture? To take stock of where we’ve been, and consider where we’re headed?
Some business concepts can be very useful when applied to our personal lives. The need for a personal audit from time to time is every bit as important as those corporate audits. Maybe more. But most of us are not that structured. We don’t talk about quarterly or annual reflections on our own lives.
No matter the time frame, some regular analysis of how we’re doing seems like a good idea.
Most of us necessarily spend our time concentrating on the day ahead of us. We put one foot in front of the other, our noses to the grindstone (or “nose down” as one of my friends calls it), and we forget to look up and out. We may make periodic changes and course corrections, but often only when we’re stressed to the max, or we get some uncomfortable indicator that our life is out of whack.
I’ve written before about how hard it is to take the time to self-reflect.
This has been one of those weeks where I’ve felt the need to re-evaluate my priorities and projects. To see if how I’m spending my time is the best use of my time. To decide if the activities I’m involved with, however enjoyable, are serving me well.
Sometimes we stay with activities simply out of inertia. Or out of a misplaced sense of loyalty. Or because it would upset others to speak up and let them know that something’s not working for us.
With two married kids and four grandchildren, a fair amount of my time is committed to my family, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. But having spent so much of my life doing caregiving of one kind or another, I also have a burning desire to work. I was a late bloomer in terms of finding my life’s passion. Now that I’ve found it, I want to continue geeking out about it for as long as I can. I’m out of sync with many of my friends who are excited about retiring, but that’s okay. I’m having a blast.
The dictionary definition of “to take stock” is “to think carefully about a situation or event and form an opinion about it, so that you can decide what to do next.”
If you’re ready to get started on your own life audit, here’s an article with 27 questions that will get your juices flowing. I like the way writer Kate Hanley organizes them into these groupings:
The Good (things you’re thankful for, proud of, and contributions you are making)
The Bad (what’s bugging you, what keeps you up at night, what you are afraid of)
The Way Forward (what needs to change, what you want to commit to, how you can start making better decisions)
About the process, Kate says, “You don’t have to overthink this—as a mindset coach who talks to people about all aspects of their lives all day long, I can tell you that we all know a lot more about these topics than we initially think we do. Sometimes all it takes is asking the question and then listening for the response.”
A friend sent me this Joan Anderson quote this morning: “Put yourself on the calendar too.” I appreciate the timely advice! It’s the middle of the fourth quarter and I’ve got some work to do before the new year starts.
How about you?
Affectionately,
Elaine