Cheering for Your Loved Ones
Photo by VELOBAR+ on Unsplash
“Be an encourager. The world has plenty of critics already.”
~ Dave Willis
I’m feeling especially loved up right now because last weekend was our annual siblings’ gathering to celebrate my mom’s birthday. She would have been 103. Since October is one of the prettiest months here in North Carolina, we decided it would be a good time of year to meet up, and we’ve been doing so since she passed in 2017.
Before the weekend, my two sisters and I try to sneak away for a quick overnight together at a B&B. This year we stayed at the Elmwood 1820 Inn in a town on the Pamlico River called Washington (nicknamed “Little Washington”). With its impressive antebellum homes and historic storefronts, the town is idyllic. Even the predicted rain held off so we could stroll along the waterfront at sunset and have appetizers at a sidewalk cafe.
Our main weekend event is a siblings’ luncheon on Saturday along with our spouses. As we eat, we take turns pulling slips of paper out of a little box and answering the questions on them. This year they were mostly about our childhoods. Favorite birthday, favorite meal as a kid, first car, most interesting science project, etc. With our age difference spanning nearly 14 years, our experiences growing up were quite different, so we’ve been trying to fill in the gaps for each other. We ended the discussion with a lightning round of “one activity that currently brings you joy.” Not surprisingly, more than one of us said “spending time with grandchildren.” We are bonded in many ways, but the most important one is by the love we have for each other’s children and grandchildren.
My eldest sister, who promised Mom before she passed to keep our clan together, often reminds us that as siblings, we are our best cheerleaders. This year in particular, with so much discord in the country, we feel grateful we’ve successfully navigated our differences and remained close.
Who are your biggest cheerleaders?
Doesn’t it feel so good to have a few people in your corner who embrace your ideas just because they want the best for you? They are the first ones you want to call with good news—the ones you’re sure will enthusiastically and vocally support you.
It’s amazing how just a little bit of affirmation at the right time can change our whole outlook.
It allows us to keep going, to push ourselves harder, to gain more ground. In some way, we’re all starving for attention, so to hear an encouraging word, get a bit of praise, or a high five—they mean more than most of us are willing to admit.
I’ve shared some on this blog about how to be there to support others when they’re struggling. But it’s just as important to be there to cheer them on in their new endeavors and to celebrate their successes. No matter whether friends are starting at square one or are on the road to success, encouragement looks the same.
Show up, listen, keep the focus on them, be honest when asked for advice, and offer to help.
For more insight on rooting for others, check out these articles on the topic:
How to Support Others
Support Someone in Being Their Best
Be a Cheerleader for Someone Else
How to be a Cheerleader for Your People
As the writer of the last article says, “You might be starting from ground zero, as someone who is not one to vocalize praise. You might be a natural encourager already, ready to take on some new ideas to inspire your people. Wherever you find yourself, remember to take initiative with your relationships. Be the encourager you want to have.”
When it comes to your friends, and especially your loved ones, it doesn’t matter whether you jump up and down and scream out loud at their good news as one of my besties does, or offer quiet support by pitching in behind the scenes when necessary as my hubby does.
What matters is that you make it clear you are there for them, proud of them, and are happy to be along for the ride.
The reward—the guarantee of a deeper and stronger relationship—will come back to you tenfold.
Affectionately,
Elaine