Rightsizing Your Life, and Your Life Stories
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“Edit your life frequently and ruthlessly. It’s your masterpiece after all.”
~ Nathan W. Morris
This week I was contacted by a reader who came across one of my previous posts about the usefulness of conducting a periodic life audit. She works for a company called Hire a Helper (a moving company) and shared an article by one of their bloggers, Casey Bond, on a topic related to my post. It’s about a different kind of audit—looking at your possessions to see which ones are serving you and which aren’t. As opposed to downsizing, she calls the concept rightsizing, a business term that has to do with creating optimal-size companies.
Unbeknownst to the reader who approached me, the article is a timely one for me, since my daughter and her family will be moving across the country this summer. They are in the process of trying to purge before the packing begins, which is inspiring me to do some badly needed purging of my own. I may reread one of my favorite books on minimalism, Simple Abundance by Sarah Ban Breathnach, for inspiration. Since our personal belongings remind us of our stories, it’s hard to let them go. The sorting can be tedious and exhausting.
How do we make decisions about what to discard and what to hold onto from a particular time or place in our lives?
In the past few weeks, I’ve been working with two authors who are writing memoirs. One is writing a reflection on her travels to Europe, mainly for her grandchildren, so in years to come they will know something of her life. The other is writing about her past struggles with serious mental health issues as a young adult. She wants to help reduce the stigma and encourage others that recovery is possible.
The women are at the stage of solidifying their outlines, an essential task for authors. Helping them to “find the book” in the large amount of material they often start with is fun for me. I wonder if professional organizers find similar satisfaction in getting everything just so? In my experience, what writers struggle with most at this stage is having to cut back in order to allow their message to shine through. Their challenge is similar to my daughter’s: what to let go of and what to keep from various times and places in their lives. In other words, rightsizing.
As opposed to autobiographies, which can include stories from one’s whole life, memoirs are based on a particular theme and include anecdotes relevant only to that theme. In order to decide the focus of their memoirs, authors have to ask themselves what aspects of their lives have been most consequential and why.
Whether we’re talking about sorting through our physical items or sorting through our memories, the decision about what’s important for us to hold onto comes down to our values.
It requires thoughtful consideration about who we are, what gives our life meaning, and what we want to pass down to future generations as part of our legacy.
As Casey Bond describes it, deciding what to preserve comes down to quality over quantity. It’s important to be intentional. And mindful.
Reflecting on our values and goals provides a framework for making our decisions.
A few years ago when the KonMari method was trending, minimalist Marie Kondo taught us in her videos how to assess what brings us joy and what we need to sell or donate.
When we cling to too much stuff, it overwhelms us, which is why it’s important to do periodic audits of our belongings.
Similarly, in a memoir, too many stories overwhelm the reader. So often in writing, “less is more.” Cutting the unnecessary parts helps to bring the central message into focus. It’s all about paring down, discarding, and releasing that which is not serving the book.
In what area of your life are you feeling the need to pare back to get more clarity?
In this new year, I wish you the courage to begin shedding what you need to so you can feel lighter. It may take some effort, but the energy you will gain will allow you to focus on the new memories you want to create.
Affectionately,
Elaine